About jerks and a motocyclist...

What a day...

As usual, I would sleep late at night and wake up very late.

What's different about today was the fact that I witnessed an accident.

I was on my way to Jusco Cheras Selatan to watch a movie (which I later changed my mind), and there was a heavily modified proton car on the road. You know what they say about people driving a heavily-modified-trying-too-hard-to-replicate-a-sporty-car, they drive recklessly and trying soo hard to show they got balls. So what happened was, I was right behind his car and saw that there was a motorcyclist signalling to go to the right to make a u-turn, and the thing was, he didn't see, and ran him over!!! I saw the motorcyclist flying from his motorcycle and went face-down on the road. He was unconcious straight away. At that moment, I thank God that I was able to stop my car and not ramming into the stupid Proton car, and that I was safe.

I stopped by the roadside, fumbling over the choices that I had to make. Should I go out of the car and help him? But what can I do? I'm no doctor! I tried to call Abg Milah, trying to get her to tell me what to do but she did not pick up my call. In the end, I put my gear into D and drove along the highway without looking back.

I have to admit that I regretted not going out of the car and help the poor guy. but in all honesty, I was alone in the car. There was a traffic police and with other guys helping him, I really felt that there was nothing I could do. So now, I'm sitting at Starbucks, mulling over my decisions - whether I made the right one.

After the incident, while I was still driving, I can't help but think about the poor guy, wondering who he is, whether he's a student, or how his mother would react to his the accident. Would his mother react the way mine did? Or would his mother be calm and accepting? Or does he even have a mother?

And then, it got me to thinking about the jerk who has no balls and what he would do. Would he apologise to the motorcyclist? Would he come and visit him when he's lying on the hospital bed with broken bones and maybe coupled with short-term memory loss? Then, my mind took me to a place where I thought I have put to rest a long time ago. Who was the person who ran me over and broke 5 of the bones in my body. Who was he? All of the information I had on him was that he's a married Malay guy with a shaved head. I wonder how he's doing now and what changed him after the accident. Did the accident changed him at all? Does he still drive now? If so, how's his driving? Does the image of my body rammed into his windshield and flew up to his car roof still rooted in his mind? Does he feel sorry for what happened? Does he feel the need to apologise to me at all after all these years?

I really thought that I had resolved any issues that I had with him. Apparently I haven't. It is just buried deep in my thoughts all these years. It took me witnessing another similar accident to stir everything up.

My sorrowful entry stops here today. I just wish I did not write all of this down but I feel like I had to in order to get my head in the right place. I'm self-meditating and I'm okay now. Seriously, I'm okay.... I really hope what had happened to me more than 6 years ago will never be brought up this vividly again after this. So, until the next entry (which will be in a long time, I bet), Au Revoir...